🍰54. birthdays

session 54 • december 11 2022 • 1,320 words

🌞 DAY 13 • 📅 MARPENOTH 3 • 🎂🦋

Boning

We finish up our short rest rather quietly before heading back out into the cave, eventually stumbling upon a closed door. Soren listens and hears some light, hollow thudding; Hugh looks under the door and sees a horrifying amalgamation of bones that have formed into one huge skeletal monstrosity.

Hugh reports to us that the bones have formed an orgy.

Though Soren wants to just leave and entrust cleaning the rest of Wave Echo Cave to some other adventurers, Sildar prompts him about being a hero and he takes the bait just like that LMAO. During the ensuing fight, Soren backs into a cave filled with stirges and Sildar saves him with a bait-n-switch.

After a relatively easy fight due to our range and the creature's lack of intelligence, Hugh turns his attention to the stirges, using his magical symbiote ring to dessicate and suck dry one of the attacking stirges. This gives him a strange, stirring sense of satiation.

Soren, seeing Hugh's strange affinity with the flesh-sucking ring, inquires where Nezznar had gotten the ring from; Nezznar claims to have slaughtered a caravan of myconids on his way to the surface--though he remarks on how odd it was to have found myconids where he did.

Nezznar ominously says "they strayed too far from home and paid the price for it". Soren willfully ignores the thinly-veiled threat.

Soren thanks Sildar for the clutch B&S and heals him; Sildar kisses Soren on the cheek. Shortly after this, we find a cavern leading back to the first rope we'd used to get into the cave, and are greeted by the light of dawn as we finally emerge, victorious, from Wave Echo Cave.

The Trek Home

Realizing what a long trek it is home with all the copper coins we've discovered in the cave, the group pulls several animals from the Bag of Tricks to help with the weight issues.

We get a panther (heavy Soren breathing), a dire wolf (which Soren promptly starts riding) and a rat.

Naturally, Nezznar wonders if it's Soren's dinner time, referring to when he used to force Soren to eat rats. Soren sneers that maybe this time they can share; Nezznar implies he would never do such a thing even in the face of starvation.

Along the way, Soren apologizes to Will for giving Nezznar information. Though Will says that it's fine, he's clearly bothered by it still, and Soren is unsure how to push for more communication; so they both push past the issue for the moment, with Soren promising to never do anything like that again.

The Good News

Nezznar, the eavesdropping little whore, is like "ohh?? never again? but i still have more information you want! what about your ✨ D A D D Y ✨?"

Soren tries to pretend he doesn't care, but Nezznar informs Soren that Dresnan had served his purpose with Amalka and when "nobles are done with something, they get rid of it". Soren, increasingly distraught, straight up asks if he's dead; Nezznar taunts him but eventually, sardonically citing that "it's your special day", admits that Dresnan escaped before he was to be sacrificed, and his whereabouts are unknown.

Soren, knowing that Dresnan taught him everything about surviving in the Underdark and is very possibly living in safety away from Menzoberranzan, is relieved. He expresses surprise about Nezznar knowing his birthday--Nezznar sneers that he was meticulous about his slaves.

Birthdays!

Will notices and asks if it's Soren's birthday, Soren admits that it is, but is dismissive as the lowborn drow never tend to have it celebrated. Will expresses that they'll have to celebrate tonight, and Soren is happy elf ears even though he tries to hide it.

We exchange group birthdays:

Sildar - Eleasis 13 (Aug) Hugh - Nightal 25 (Dec) Soren - Marpenoth 3 (Oct) Will - Marpenoth 8 (Oct) (SOON!)

Awkward silence ensues, Soren asks for Nezznar's birthday lmao. Surprisingly, he admits that it's Marpenoth 30 and Soren realizes that he's never seen Nezznar's birthday celebrated by House Xorlarrin either, despite him being a noble.

Soren, grateful for the information that Nezznar provided about his patron, says "maybe we'll get you a slab of rare rothe", which Soren knows to be his favorite food. Nezznar is disbelieving of this and sneers that Soren's jokes suck ass. Soren was not joking sjdldkfja

A Friend's Bedroom

Soren goes into his sanctuary, where Pip Stonehill has been sleeping and chliling. He explains the situation and calms Pip down.

Pip is curious about the sanctuary, which is a drow's bedroom. Soren briefly explains that it's his friend's room, and that he wants to keep it tidy for her until she gets back.

Soren gives Pip some food and tells him to sit tight for just a few more hours until they bring him back to his family.

Along the way back, Soren collects herbs and manages to hunt down a giant boar with the help of the party, for the heroes' feast of that night.

Phandalin Once More

Eventually, we reach Phandalin and release the Pip for Toblen. The innkeeper is moved to tears and extremely grateful, giving us the keys to the inn for the day while he spends some time with his family. He offers to clean the boar for Soren to use that night, which Soren accepts.

Toblen wonders about the malding human we have in tow LMAO, we do Not tell him it's the Black Spider in disguise, but rather that it's an "ass we found on the side of the road". Nezznar bristles. Toblen offers to take him to prison lol we're like NOOOoPE bc this dude still has like 16 str

Nezznar has become increasingly reluctant to enter a surfacer civilization and is more or less getting dragged. Soren comments that the more he drags his feet, the more he looks like a dog on a leash--that he should walk closer to the group. Nezznar snidely comments that "being paraded as a dog, or walking alongside you as your equal, I'm not sure which is worse"--but does keep close behind Soren, the same way Soren used to follow him around at his heels. The irony is not lost on either of them.

DROOP DROOP DROOP

We go to Garaele's house, where we are tackled by an ecstatic Droop, followed by a clown fiesta of a conversation as Hugh attempts to explain to Droop the concept of money since a portion of our gold is going to him and he receives upward of 1,000+ cp.

Soren explains the money in terms of how many steaks 1,000+ cp can buy, and Droop dashes off to Barthen's to buy approximately 300 steaks.

The Three Brothers

We learn that Nundro arrived safely and has been conversing with Gundren. We go to talk to them, but not before Hugh and Garaele set up another fuck date im losing it. Soren gets his Raise-Tharden-From-Dead-Fund money back because we produce the 500GP diamond from Wave Echo Cave.

Garaele inquires about the malding prisoner, we explain that it's Nezznar and that we are bringing him to Waterdeep for questioning. She hints that the Harpers will be informed about this, but acknowledges that it'd be good for any good-aligned faction such as the Lord's Alliance interrogate the Spider.

Soren and Sildar stay to guard Nezznar as Hugh, Will, Gundren, Nundro and Garaele go to revive Tharden. Will sees firsthand the cruelties that Nezznar had inflicted on the dwarf, and Garaele uses a valuable scroll (WE'LL GO TO CONYBERRY FOR YOUR JOB SOON BBY WE'RE SO SORRY) to successfully revive a weakened and unconscious Tharden.

Back at the house, Soren wonders if the lyre was a birthday gift from Nezznar, since he'd thought it was a coincidence he received it on his birthday. Nezznar sneers that "there is meaning behind all my actions", implying that it was.